Brutus in Julius Caesar said it best that "We have come to bury Caesar not to praise him. The good that men do in their lives is often interred with their bones but the evil they do often lives after them". This was Brutus's final obituary for Caesar. I believe a person's life shouldn't be spelled out in one final obituary and I don't believe we should focus on any evil they did but, stay focused on the good. There are so many other important things that they did and said in their life than their occupation, their kids, their family, birthday, death day, etc.. What should be put in that final obituary is the lives they lived, the relationships they nurtured, the good they did, and the love they gave. As I write this I am losing one of the most important people to me in my life, my Grandmother. She was the only grandparent I ever knew growing up. I didn't know any of my other grandparent's that well because they passed on before I got the chance to know them. I think she tried to make up for this during my life with her. She taught me a lot of really good things growing up and I would like to share them with you.
Mamaw as we knew her first taught us how to laugh. I don't think I have ever met another human that loved to laugh as much as my Mamaw. She loved to sit around and tell stories and laugh. She didn't worry about tomorrow or fret about the past. She was happy right then in the present and only focused on spreading her happiness. I think that is how God want us our life to be. I think he wants our life to be filled with happiness and laughter. I think God knows that happiness is like a disease, that it spreads. If happiness was a disease then Mamaw was ground zero for our family. Now let me say she wasn't happy and laughing 100% the time, but I would bet it was close to 99% of the time. I don't think anyone can be. There are times in life that aren't filled with happiness and laughter. I think Mamaw would smile and laugh her way out of those times though. Zig Ziglar said that happiness and laughter should be just like pants. It should be part of our wardrobe that we put on each day. Even the days when you don't feel like it. You can't walk out of your house without pants. So why would you try to leave home without a smile? If you practice laughing and smiling it becomes a part of you. I think Mamaw knew this exact this concept.
Second, She taught us how to love. God told us in 2 Corinthians that love is the greatest gift we can give first to him,then to our self, and then to others. If you don't love God you can't love yourself or others. She loved God. I saw it in her being faithful to God, reading the bible, praying, and walking the walk. If you love God then and only then you can love yourself. She loved herself to the last breath. I will be the first to tell you if I would have been in her shoes it would have been hard to love what God had given me to work with. Mamaw was like an old old beat up 57 Chevy truck you see going down the highway. You look at it and by the looks of it you wonder how in the world is that thing still going? Mamaw was that 57 Chevy, she had horrible arthritis in her hands and feet, couldn't see, problems with her digestive system, and heart problems. I never saw her get down because of the hand God dealt her though. She kept right on and she loved herself. If you love God and love yourself God gives you the ability to love others. She loved everybody. I think one of the greatest traits we can take away from Mamaw was her ability to love others. She loved like it was going out of style. Mamaw understood that Love is a verb. It was not a noun or just something that just flows out of our mouth and means nothing. She proved her love by her actions towards others and not just saying I love you. She never once let me leave her house without telling me she loved me and hugging me though. I will think back on Mamaw and I will remember most the times was time spent around her pecan tree in her front yard talking and the way she loved spending time there with her family and friends. A man once told me the greatest things we can work for in life is not money, records, social recognition, but to see how many people we can pack into a funeral home for our funeral. By the number that shows for our funeral is the number of people we showed love to throughout life. As I sit here pre-funeral for Mamaw's funeral, I know it will be standing room only because of the love she gave.
Lastly and most important is the way she lived. She lived a life that brought glory to God. She gave her life over to God at a young age. She realized it wasn't her life to live but a life for God to live through. She set an example on the way that life is supposed to be lived that I was glad to be able to witness. She was close to God. She exemplified everything of a Proverbs 31 woman should be. She set an example for her own kids to follow and now they are passing those same qualities down to their kids and grand kids. I can see good qualities from Mamaw in each of my Aunts and Uncles that were passed on to them from her. I mean I couldn't ask for a better group of Aunts and Uncles and my own Mom to look up to. Even to those of us that didn't have the privilege of being raised by her, she showed us how life was supposed to be lived. She spent time with her grand kids. It wasn't a hassle for her to spend time with us grand kids. She looked at it as an opportunity and a privilege to pass on some wisdom to part of her family tree in her grand kids. One of the biggest things I remember is no matter what she was doing, if any of her grand kids showed up at her house she would stop whatever she was doing and spend time with us. She understood the most important thing in this world outside of God was family and being a mentor to that family.
You know as I am sitting here writing this, I could have filled this up with funny stories of Mamaw. I think God wants us to remember those and I think they are important, but I think the main thing God wants us to take away from Mamaw and her life was her ability to laugh, love and live. I know one day I will come to the end of the road here on earth and I hope people are remembering me in this way. We will never see Mamaw again in an earthly body, but one day if you have given your life over to Jesus we will all spend eternity together with her. I know it is gonna be a special time filled with watermelons, tomatoes, and visiting.
